Grandpa has left....

A month ago, I was suppose to blog on grandpa's health condition. He was not so well when we brought him to stay with us early this year. Some said when a person grows older, his life cycle will go back to being a child. I couldn't agree more. He would forget that he has eaten, thus asking for food every half hour. Sometimes, he even told us he hasn't eat any rice for 3 days. Gosh! If outsiders were to hear that, what would they think? His DIL (Mum) is torturing him? He would sometimes pee or poo in his pants, a few times a day. There were times where he ran out of pants. They were not drying fast enough for him to change. Another thing is his biological clock changed. His day will turn into sleeping time, and when nights come, he was like an owl. It won't be a big problem has he not tried to walk around and fell; or kept banging on the bedpost and left everyone with panda eyes. Grandpa also has bad habits that will make one feel so disgust just by seeing him. I hate to say this but his behavior makes the house kiosk!

His health deteriorated a month ago. I received a call from Mum after my facial session saying that Grandpa was having breathing difficulties and was admitted to ICU. That really gave me a shock. Although all this while I tried to get away from all the screaming and his disgusting acts, but the thought of him suffering makes my heart ache. Report came out to show that his right lungs has collapsed and the left one is not strong enough. He can only be on liquidize food, not thru his mouth but by inserting tubes thru his nose. When I visited him after he was transferred to normal ward. Only then I noticed how much he aged compare to last year. He's left with skin covering his bones. And tubes all over his bodies which makes him uncomfortable. The doctor has no choice but to tied up his hands when he tried to pull those tubes out.

After a week in hospital, Grandpa's children ( Dad and other siblings) decided to put him in the care center back in his hometown. They couldn't take care of him anymore as he required feeding thru tubes. If there's a slight mistake when feeding, the liquid might get into his lungs and prevent him from breathing. They made it a point to visit him whenver they were free. I too have a chance to visit him twice, on weekends. But that was it.

Barely after a month from his admission into ICU, he finally left peacefully on 19th August. We rushed back hometown when we received the call. As soon as we entered his house, he was lying there, in the middle of living room, naked with only a red cloth covering his private part. His body frame was like those malnutrition people in Somalia. I really cried my heart out. Before this we were prepared for this, I thought I was strong enough already. But the sight and thought that he will not get up again just got my tears to roll non stop. During the few days stayed in that house, I didn't cry anymore. I thought, "That's it. I has learned to accept it." But I failed again on the last day. When the people from funeral services started to pour in, my tears welled up again. The moment the casket's car come in, I was crying like mad. I went in to take a last look and cried for so long for the first time since Grandma passed away 2 years ago. I could only remember crying and crying and more crying......

Now into the second week already. This coming Saturday, we need to go back to celebrate Grandpa birthday for the first time. I will be strong...........

TOP 11 Reasons Not a Good Idea to put the Groom in charge of the wedding

I stumble upon this TOP 11 Reasons Not a good idea to put the Groom in charge of the wedding written by Kelley Lynn in on of the bride's website. This is so COOL! If there were such groom, I don't know how the bride will react. What will you do if you are in that shoe?

"Ah, wedding planning. Isn't it the greatest joy? (insert sarcastic tone here) Brides-to-be: have you had those days where you just want to pull your hair out, or preferably someone else's hair; out of pure frustration? Are you stressed beyond your wildest imagination; knee-deep in DJ contracts, color schemes, and bridesmaids dresses; only to look over and see your dear fiance heavily engrossed in a game of "Grand Theft Auto" on his Playstation? And in this frustrated, stressed-out level of persona, have you gone so far as to gently ask your beloved fiance for some HELP? Oh dear.

I remember one such day during my own wedding planning. I was annoyed, overwhelmed, and trying to book all the vendors on a time line, along with working a full-time job of course. We didn't have the budget for a wedding planner, and mom and dad live out of state, so I was pretty much on my own as far as the small (subtext GIGANTIC) details of planning. However, I had given my fiance one job to take care of. ONE JOB. Since our potential DJ was a good friend and ex-employee of my fiance's buddy, I thought it best that he call his friend to get the contact info for the DJ. So, days go by. Then weeks. I ask sweetly if he called his friend yet and got the DJ information. "Yeah I called and left a message, he hasn't called me back yet." This went on for weeks. The friend never got back to him. Finally, knowing that we were on a time line and needed to book this guy NOW or never, I told my fiance to please give me his friend's phone number and that I would call him. His response was, "Well okay, but what's the point? If he hasn't called me back, he isn't going to call you back either." Wrong. I called the number, left a polite but semi-urgent sounding message to get me this information, and guess what? He called me back immediately, the same day. We booked the DJ and all was well.

So what was the lesson in that little story? The lesson is this: If you think you want your fiance's "help" with planning your wedding, think again. His idea of help may actually cause you more stress and more work in the long run. Men, for whatever reason, don't seem to comprehend that weddings take time to plan, and that you have to start early. And that's not all - they don't understand about weddings. So in the end, do we really want our fiance's in charge of the important things regarding our wedding? Probably not. And If I haven't yet convinced you, here are the..."

Top 11 Reasons Its NOT a Good Idea to Put The Groom In Charge of the Wedding ...


11. Instead of tuxedos, camoflauge pants for the Ushers and tye-dye shirts for the Groomsmen.

10. Wedding Vows would include words like "Yeah," "Ditto," "Whatever dude" and "Cool."

9. Instead of flower bouquets, Bride would carry bag of chips for Groom to snack on during ceremony.

8. Bridesmaids would wear a selection of skimpy string- bikinis with stiletto heels.

7. All Sunday weddings would be banned during Football Season.

6. Wedding Cake would be of the Hostess or Little Debbie Snack Cake variety.

5. Classy Mozart ceremony music replaced by all "Ozzy" (or rocker of your choice.)

4. During ceremony, Bride would be forced to participate in emotional "giving of the Remote Control" custom

3. Why spent thousands of dollars on a stuffy, elegant reception site when we can just have wings at Hooters?

2. Dancing is out. Giant TV screen featuring "Guitar Hero" and "Splinter Cell" is in.

1. Signature cocktail ... Beer.

Feel free to add to the list. What's yours?

Flickr Monkey

Oh...Here's another puppets that might interest you. Well, it did for me. He comes in different colors and he has friends too. Check out flickr bird and dog.


All this can be found at Flickr Monkey.

Finger Puppets

Cute lil finger puppets for play. They can be downloaded for FREE at TerraCotta and they are easy to make. Have fun trying them out.

Good bye, Rina

Today we are bidding goodbye to our indo maid, Rina who has been with us for a short 6 months. The purpose of having her with in our house in the first place was because Grandpa is senile and seriously in need of someone to take care of him, erm......more to taking care of his 'output'. My parents decided to take care of him when they moved back to penang early this year. Previously, Grandpa has been staying with the youngest aunt in KL for a year or so. They are seldom at home, which I don't know why since they are not working anymore. So Grandpa was left in Rina's hand in the double-storey house everyday. They will not care whether he eat, or sleep or is healthy or not. I believe they think they shelter they gave was more than enough. Since then, Grandpa has been shrinking till you can see only the skin is covering the bone. He has refused to eat, and was always lying on the sofa whole day long. Sometimes, he couldn't even control his pee and poo. Rina told us, aunt's husband (I called him Uncle) once brought Grandpa to walk in a nearby park and Grandpa just poo there and then. Uncle was so embarrassed that he just told Rina to clean up and he himself ran away.

Mum, the filial daughter in law, took over the duty and so Grandpa and Rina were brought back to our tiny apartment. A 700sqft with 6 occupants. Since the arrival of Grandpa and Rina, the house was in havoc till last week. Almost everyday something will break or gone missing. I found our rhino with a broken leg but still standing as if nothing has happen. The table mat flew off the window. The laughing Buddha statue my sis bought from S'pore was turned into so many pieces, I wouldn't recognise it had I not been told. The fridge magnet was separated from the magnet itself. The newly bought dining table and chairs have scratches you'll think it was bought a few years back. Oh....there are so many more I couldn't possibly list them all. Everything that happened, she never failed to give excuses. The limp rhino could only happen if she throw it back to the floor when she was sweeping. But she didn't say a thing till I saw it one morning. She could almost swear she kept the table mat already and it's just misplace. My mum was furious that Rina didn't want to admit her mistake, instead is full of excuses. So Mum let her find high and low for the not-in-the-house-anymore-mat. After searching for nearly an hour, then only she told Mum a big maybe the mat flew of the window. To that, she received a BIG scolding and lecture from Mum. The fridge magnet, she said it just fell down by itself but Mum suspected it fell when Rina open the fridge to take a peep, which she was not suppose to do so. Every other things that were broken, she has put the blame on my poor senile Grandpa.

That's not all. It's hard to bring Grandpa to everywhere my parents go. So together with Rina, they will have the whole house to themselves till anyone of us is back, except our bedroom which we keep our personal things. My parents come back time was quite consistent. So Rina will know when to prepare herself to be goodie good girl. There was a few times when Mum came back unexpectedly and caught her running to bathroom to hide ( we couldn't figure out why) or was struggling to swallow with her mouth full of I-don't-know-what. Sometimes she was even caught playing the piano or lying on the sofa. Mum found that some of her food is missing sometimes. With all these, Mum will sometimes quiet as a mouse, slip into the house without her noticing it. Once Mum saw her with a broom in one hand and another with the TV remote control. Obviously, Mum, the good hearted lady couldn't just scold her. So she walk out again and purposely open the grill loudly. In a spilt second, the TV is off and there she was, sweeping like a VERY GOOD maid. Sigh....my mum is so kind to just keep an eye close for most of the mistakes Rina made. She always said she don't want a maid cause she couldn't command others to do things. But that didn't happen to us. We'll get nag nag nag till the chores are done, perfectly.

Leaving Grandpa in Rina's hand does cause anxiety in every member of the house, including both my married sisters who are leaving else where. This was because Grandpa has fell a few times but he couldn't remember the incident for long. Sometimes when my parents came home to find Grandpa quiet and act differently, they'll know that something happen AGAIN. Either he fell down and knock his head or there are bruises on his hands and legs. No, Rina will not report anything also till she's forced. Sometimes I pitied her for the sleepless night Grandpa gave her but other times, I just felt like slapping her face. You'll know something is wrong when she mumbles to your questions. The most unforgivable thing she did was she slapped both Grandpa's cheeks. Luckily, my parents came back within Grandpa's memory time frame so he can still relate the incident. This made Dad and Mum so furious, Rina received a good scolding till she don't dare to make a noise and was sad the whole day.

If she is the kind that is hardworking and obedient, we will definitely appreciate her and treat her better. if not for her to take care of the poo and pee, she'll be dispensed so long ago. She's been in Malaysia for 3 years and been to 3 houses. The first employee reported Rina stole $$ from them. So they sent her back to the agent. The second employee, which was my aunt, caught a man in their home upon coming home early one Sunday morning after Sunday class. We decided to change her before this but due to the long processing period and extra charges to get new one, we have to stick to her till today.

Grandpa was ill and warded to Hospital last week. Now he's bedridden and on only liquidize food thru tube, Dad and his other siblings feel that the special care center will be a better place compare to taking turn feeding him. A wrong move will cause life....no jokes. Arrangement was made and Grandpa is in the new home since yesterday. Leaving Rina alone in the house will not be a wise choice. Furthermore, we can take care of our laundry and the house ourselves. With this in mind, she'll be put on bus back to KL today. So does not know it before hand, for fear she'll make plot to keep the stolen things on her body. Dad will take her down for lunch and Mum will join them later after she pack Rina's bag. Hopefully, she'll be able to go back to her hometown with her hard earned money thru all this year.

GOODBYE, RINA!